&

Goodbye

2010-12-28T20:31:00.000+08:00

Alright. Hi.

I am here to announce that I shall be taking the briefest of breaks (may be a terrible lie) from blogspot and shall be temporarily moving to tumblr.

This is such an inevitable move, to explain it almost feels wrong somehow. But I shall do my best anyway.

It just seems like this blog (I love you) has become focused on mundane, boring subjects and above all stagnant. Every time I have something interesting/ selfish to blog about it seems to fizzle out by the time I reach this page! Something is stifling my creativity and self-expression, and I don't approve.

But why tumblr?

Sure sure, I can't stand how tumblr's format complies all the pictures I post into an album- a massive slideshow glob- but then again, when was the last time I had the initiative to actually blog about an outing/ memorable event?

And yeah, I don't particularly fancy their colour scheme. (Yes, I am shallow like that) But I do love the freedom they give you in designing your own page!

Plus I like how tumblr allows you to express so much about yourself through a few simple pictures. Most of all, I love how you can just reblog a few choice images and not have to commit yourself to an entire solid post whenever you get that urge to blog. There is something very comforting about having that kind of flexibility that I believe will make for better posts. That'll also come in handy next year when AUSMAT swamps me with homework and endless assignments. :|

In all honesty, the only reason I have delayed this shift is my loyalty to plinee.blogspot.com. What does it say of me when I can so easily dump my bestcyberfriend when the going gets tough?

Which is why I have come up with a solution. No matter what happens, this page shall remain open. Children will still be able to play here, adults read their papers and ice cream men sell their wares. Never shall I let the light of day see the demolishment of this blog in this part of Afri-

You get the drift.

So farewell dear blog. Have fun hibernating!

Love,
Paulinenator.

2010-12-15T13:24:00.000+08:00

the healing powers of James Morrison.

2010-12-10T01:27:00.000+08:00

DUDE HOW DEJA VU IS THIS: I just spent like, [a considerable number] hour(s) drafting a post on my The Great Gatsby reading experience and how I absolutely love the book despite initially thinking I'd hate it la di da stuff like that only to realize I've done the exact same post not too long ago (Sept 12) which means past me has already done the job for present me!

*inhales*

Woah. That is waay too cool for the club to handle.

Okay. Time to go drink more water so HOPEFULLY the wretched triangular pimple formation on my face will disappear by tomorrow evening. Bye world.

THESE ARE SO DAMN FUNNY

2010-11-22T23:36:00.000+08:00

BAHAHAHAHAHA! the first cartoon strip kinda reminds me of me. I tend to be crazy-wacko like that. LOL.

damn this site is hilarious. knock yourselves out!

Ew grammer mistakes

2010-11-09T12:13:00.000+08:00

Just reread a few of my previous posts only to realize- I am guilty of having committed quite a few grammatical errors over the past few years.

Gag. Sorry guys. (assuming I have followers, somewhere out there) I know the number one rule to blogging- blogging well I mean - is to not make grammatical mistakes. Somehow I never seem to proofread, or proofread really badly. :(

So once again, sorry!
Okay I gotsta go eat now. Baiseeyoupeepslater.

2010-11-02T17:57:00.001+08:00

If I die young bury me in satin

Lay me down on a bed of roses

Sink me in the river at dawn

Send me away with the words of a love song

The Kite Runner

2010-10-27T16:44:00.000+08:00

I don't really want to talk about it, but I will say that I think it's one of the Most Disturbing movies I have watched. Ever.

.. and apparently A Time to Kill is much worse. Hello next English class.

Ps: click on Most Disturbing to read an article I found online about.. (to me) the most disturbing part in the movie.

Oh and out of context but- realized my instant-recall skills when it comes to pictures/ slideshows/ details in general are quite bad. I couldn't connect two and two together well enough and am constantly getting my facts wrong. Shucks la. This is one of those moments (yes, one of the many) when I feel I totally don't belong in the class/ group/ JPA cohort.

Feel so.. defeated. I know a nap isn't going to help, so I may as well do with a cuppa tea.

BTW: Highlight of the day was the visit from Yoke, HQ, Aik and Mel. Uhuh uhuh, you heard right- they came to Sunway for breakfast! :) Insanely happy. HEE. Hope next time they come get to meet the gang. (Hope there will be a next time. Lol. Hi guys I hope someone reads this.)

AWWH, so cute. My housemate (Waina) just came and asked me if I'm scared, and left her room door open for me. :) Must be because I am huddled against a wall typing in our living room. Damn this, need to be less sensitive/ reactive to those kinda things lah. Haijo how to be a lawyer. :/

K, I'm off. Bye world. I'm sorry if this post makes no sense, I guess on some level it's not supposed to.

Bananas

2010-10-25T23:44:00.000+08:00

Music plays a minimal role in my life when I am at home. Not so in the hostel. I know it's kinda random- but i just wanted to put it out there.

I REALLY feel like activating my Tumblr just so I can reblog EVERYTHING from HERE.

just to commemorate today's victory. Team Say-No-To-Whaling won the PAL mini Amazing Race today! As a reward, we all received free phones from Banana Co.

a good day indeed. :)

Blogging is a dying art!

2010-10-23T21:06:00.002+08:00

Spent a good part of today desperately scouring the internet-o-sphere for updated blogs from anytime between last week and now.

And I got.. Nothing.

It seems like nobody ever blogs anymore! People have started well.. Tumblr-ing. Not that I don't adore Tumblr. Nope, I am not one of those people who think that there are only too many cupcake/ prettygirl/ inspirational quotes/pictures one can take. I love those things. I find it cool to see what attracts people, and even cooler when I find that a particular quote or picture that resonates with me as well.

Yet I do really really miss the occasional loong post from people about their life. What happened, what they hope for, what recent epiphanies have they had. Real stuff from real people. You know, stupid high-school stuff.

Ironic thing is that I myself have cut down on blogging, and when I do blog it tends to be all abstract and philosophical-type. Which must be pretty drab to read over and over again, I mean, yes, Life is Hard and Love is Complicated- but who doesn't know these things?

So today I'm going to attempt to cheer myself (and perhaps the other pining blog-readers) up by posting a post entirely (this section excluded) about my life now. No allusions, hopefully. *crinkled smiley*

Okay, here goes. I am adjusting well to Sunway. Assignments have piled up so now we're simply in the process of placing them in the Out box, which is where my huge-50% Law Project now is. On that- it went splendidly. The class laughed at all the right parts, we had fun, and most importantly: I think we DID manage to teach them something. Would love to show you guys the game Keefe and I created, but my teacher might have other plans for it. :O

All that is left is our book report for EALD and an Econs project. KahYung and I are doing our report on Life of Pi. Which, IMHO, is one of the best books ever. Been rereading it today, despite it's unappetizing book jacket (which I might change soon) and I really love it. *nerd suit UP*

Oh and I am fighting with Kun. Which is nothing new, but this Saturday would then be the first Saturday we spend apart, intentionally, since the time I've moved to Sunway. I'm not ballsy enough to share the reason for our spat here, but lets just say perhaps the time has come to.. detach a little. Ain't that right?
Edited:-
We're alright, we're alright. Drama queen man. Heh.

Anyway, best part about today and the reason I am not already in my Pjamies curled up to Life of Pi? I'm meeting my closest friends for a Snowflake at SS[insert random number] soon. Gossiping over Sea Amber Jelly has become the highlight of my weeks, so yea, excited. Hee.

Which reminds me- damn I should be getting ready to leave. See you kids later then. Hope this made someone's day, even if it's only future me when I reread this. (:

xoxo, Trampauline.

2010-10-21T22:36:00.004+08:00

The most important thing to remember: what matters to you, is what really matters.

There are few people whom I really love, and still fewer of whom I think well. The more I see of the world, the more am I dissatisfied with it; and every day confirms my belief of the inconsistency of all human characters, and of the little dependence that can be placed on the appearance of merit or sense.

Jane Austen

2010-10-18T23:34:00.002+08:00

I hate disturbing sad movies. Yet it is a pity those tend to be the award winning ones.

But still.

Hate them.

Shakespeare In Love

2010-09-30T21:54:00.002+08:00

When did love-at-first-sight begin to lose favor?

Why did passionate kisses and lingering glances and cradling of hands fall out of style?

Where did poetry and sonnets and.. well words in general disappear to?

Where did all the romance go?

So many questions, never enough answers.

xxx

Okayh I shall attempt to analyze the unhappy ending of Shakespeare In Love and rationalize it out with myself, so that when i stumble upon this post in years to come, i wont be bowled over by a wave of 'omg-yeah-that-movie-so-sad!' *insert depressed emoticon*

If you have watched the movie then you know what I speak of, and if you haven't GO WATCH IT.

The only consolation for me was that I failed to complete submerge myself in the movie (which tends to be the default reaction) because well.. Shakespeare over-romanticized everything and in general wasn't serious enough as a man to deal with the problem at hand. And by doing that, it makes you wonder: What happens if he, someway along the road, (assuming they had a happy ending) meets someone else? I mean Gwyneth Paltrow's gonna get old right? It's entirely plausible that'd he would just reason it all away, conjure up a few sad self-pitying lines to justify himself and move on. Take into example his Startfort wife. Right?

But oh my goodness, I really wished they had stayed together. and Lasted. Forever. Society needs more stories like this now, more than ever. Enough with rape, incest and all manner of sex-related horrors already! Bring back the Shakespeares, the old love we've forgotten.

Actually.. maybe Romeo and Juliet was the main play that introduced love with a catch; love with that heart-breaking twist of fate that slices up any decent heart to shreds. Maybe Shakespear is responsible for all these unhappy-ever-afters. :O

That doesn't seem right. Oh dear, another long night of pondering and reflection. :S

2010-09-30T13:30:00.000+08:00

click me, please!

stole this from Jenn's facebook link. really cute, and made me smile. (as if the cancellation of English didn't do that enough).

hmm. although i do demand food from Kun, and no, i dont think what big sisters do in terms of 'clothing sacrifice' equals to love. :O

you know I know how.

2010-09-27T18:17:00.001+08:00

Things that have irked me today:-

the grapes I am currently eating taste.. salty.
cloudy weather earlier this evening casted everything in gloomy shadows, causing me to strain my already squinty Chinese eyes.
noisy machinery right outside my bedroom. it's screeching and throbbing make me wanna just.. *gnashes teeth*
prev two aforementioned points have lead to ongoing headache. feels like a monkey is playing with a wrench in my skull.
Law homework/ project is surprisingly hard. tough. difficult. mmm.
I am finishing HIMYM and White Collar too fast for my liking.
my hair keeps flipping up at it's corners. Bree-style. heh.

Things that have perked up my day considerably:-

Law class got canceled today hence no need for college. ~~*lazes at home*~~ *stares helplessly at Law homework*
am meeting with friends and a Kun later tonight for waffles.
managed to somehow wrap my head around certain aspects of homework. (why does my day/ life revolve around homework?)
sis is coming home later/ now from Semenyih. maybe I'll do something nice for her: not demand for my toner back.
cooked today. okay wait I think this is moot because i cooked too much and am now waay bloated.

basically today was a break from the usual routine, and a welcomed break at that. although it just seems like life for me has become increasingly stagnant; despite not necessarily being an altogether bad thing, it is not a cause for celebration either.

studies seem like a.. well, a waste of time frankly. nobody (but my maths teacher) seems to be teaching a proper syllabus, and everyone seems to be teaching without that drive/ urgency needed to teach effectively. it isn't uncommon for us to walk out of class certain days feeling so disgruntled at what a complete waste of time [that] lesson was.

sigh. restlessness tends to resurface occasionally; esp when discussing A-Levels with my mum. :/

why hello there small thing. (:

Facebook just gave me a slap on the wrist!

2010-09-17T23:45:00.000+08:00

A little blue box popped up and squealed:-

You are not permitted to do that!

as i was fiddling around with my search box.

whaa..?

i could almost swear to feeling a smarting pain at my right wrist. almost.

Impeccable

2010-09-14T23:36:00.001+08:00

The only problem with LoveGivesMeHope is that before you know it, you're into page 40 and rereading all the old posts. :/

on books and past inhibitions

2010-09-12T23:10:00.003+08:00

For it wasn't only because I was mildly ill that other people and life in general seemed such a puzzle, so surprising and beyond understanding, so unknowable, and yet so fascinating. So beautiful and yet so ugly too. In a less fevered way, that is how it was for me always and still is: the surprise and fascination, the otherness, the not-me of it all.

- The Toll Bridge, Aiden Chambers

Excerpt above is a direct contradiction to the point I am about to dive into, but it is one of the things that really resonated with me from the book. Which, in a roundabout way, does coincide with my thought laid out below.

The thing is, I was really nervous about diving into my Ausmat English reading list, I do admit. The initial excitement of just.. knowing and having something to do was quickly shadowed by the fear of not understanding. You see, I've been wallowing through a sea of children-like books: fantasy mostly. On top of that, I've been steadfastly avoiding all forms of adult literature/ novels/ reading materials of any kind. Dont ask me why, occasionally i believe it to be deliberate. A by product of my disappointment in the behaviour of adults in general. Sometimes, I may even attribute it to the scum-below-my-shoe politic system Malaysia has, idk. Perhaps also because i assumed all ideas forthcoming from adults to be dark and deep. Spirals of unanswerable questions presented in verbose, complicated language.

Well I am surprised, and delightfully so, to say that my initial trepidation was completely unfounded. A complete fallacy. I have finished a few (waay too few if you ask me) books on said reading list, and have fallen in love with all of them. (okay, minus Lord of the Flies, but still)

I guess it is due to the fact that I, as a teenage asian living in a totally different time, can recognize certain -if not a majority off- ideas and perspectives brought forth by these authors. It just goes to show that some things, immortalized in writing, transcends.. well, everything. race, religion, place of origin; gender, time and age.

Which means people must be the same, some parts of them at least. And it is comforting to know we are all in some way all relatable. si?

2010-09-09T16:57:00.002+08:00

check out the most recent section. haha.

oh and will be staying over at HorngQing's place (my second sleepover, ever) to leave at 5 tomorrow morning to work as a supervisor at our beloved PM's house for the Raya Open House.

don't worry, i will remember to send off bad vibrations. ;)

WLH

2010-09-04T00:42:00.001+08:00

How many times does a butterfly blink,

before it learns to fly?

gah. heartache.

Write it on the skyline

2010-08-19T21:27:00.002+08:00

have just realized that almost all the pictures i have posted below (yesterday) were taken at twilight/ evening. and that might have been because i posted it in the evening, with the dim purple of the darkening sky stealthily invading my thoughts. *dum dum*

wow, AUSMAT is really brushing up my analytical skills. who would have thought taking a step back every now and then to see things would be so.. informative.

anyway, had another engaging english class today. discussed abortion, politics, sincerity and love.

i like how i learn so much from my peers (quite a fair bit from the one on my left) in discussions like this. it's so much easier to think out of the box when you have 30+ people working on it together. i'd hate for the class to separate, although i am interested in knowing what the shyer people have to say. fluency in a language doesnt account for good ideas and perpectives ya know.

that aside, my loaned movie (The Breakfast Club) can't be viewed on both my laptop and Waina's. grrr. and it's lease in ending tomorrow! should i just take the 7.40 bus to park myself in the library for 2 hours to watch it?

idk. Impossible by Shontelle playing on loop now. time to stop procrastinating and do something productive.

~~(i am so nervous whenever i think about getting behind a wheel again. am seriously considering defeat. help.)~~
feeling somewhat better. HEE.

Apart

2010-08-18T21:32:00.001+08:00

tilt shot.

i had two parakeets once. Polly and Budgie. Budgie died, and we set Polly free. :'(

traumatizing. i couldnt go to school for awhile after those two.

"Friendship is an involuntary reflex, it just happens, you can’t help it."

Ted (How I Met Your Mother)

love the quote, but loving the source more.

and hey.

has anyone realized that when you type 'a part' too closely, it becomes 'apart'?

hmm.

:'/

2010-08-12T22:30:00.000+08:00

more about this to come. if i am too lazy, i'll at least make the effort to update on this in word form.

oh and erm yeah. we've done it. (:

Simpleton

2010-08-12T18:58:00.000+08:00

i have always fought to be one.

reason being i am complicated enough already inside my head, without being that way in person.

when you have real, out-of-your-hands quandaries at every corner you turn, when you are subject to constant, ever-present dilemmas that you can do nothing about, you tend to think. and you never stop, because thinking, for me at least, is always on a tangent.

and so you mull, you deliberate, you settle in somewhere deep inside yourself and slowly analyse and dissect. and when that is done, you inevitably move on to a new issue, because we all know there always is one. be it a story you read or a conversation you've just had.

you see, that's where i differ. instead of allowing myself to sink into deep contemplation, i stop. or, the more viable option, tangent off to something less deep. less complex. less frown-inducing. like how that cloud looks funny. (following that, giggling will ensue)

and maybe that is my real problem. i have, somehow, oversimplified myself. in engineering the perfect response to the perils (exaggeration) of overthinking, i have decided to.. not think at all. how brilliant.

and sometimes i worry. has this caused me to lose my ability to think critically? can i no longer conduct deep analysis, conjure up witty and inspiring ideas?

in a way, maybe.

which leads to the question. is it worth it? giving up that kind of.. perception. and in return being able to still have enough air in the head to just.. laugh. a brief peace of mind, if you will.

so, is it worth it?

definitely.

xxx

(whispers) then again, maybe i'm just deluding myself into believing that i am capable of that kind of mind deflection, and in reality i think even more than before, even more than now. *pause*

and following that line of thought, maybe this is a dream inside a dream. a thought inside a thought. an idea inside an idea inside my head beneath my hair above my eyes! *wiggles eyebrows for dramatic effect*

HAHA. jokes aside though, i guess when it comes down to it, i may, at heart, be a simpleton, but i am still glad for the relapses. if ive learnt anything from my mind contortions today, it's that being not deep (i think the correct term is shallow, but that sounds.. odd) all the time doesn't mean i can't be deep at all. i just have to learn to appreciate the beauty from both sides.

and that is good enough for me.

Silver lining(s)

2010-08-11T14:32:00.001+08:00

there is one in every disaster.

Not quite there yet, but On the Way.

2010-08-04T20:50:00.002+08:00

it really is.

i've realized, that in time, i've just started to grow younger and younger (mentally) after hitting the age of 18.

for example:-

i no longer hold on to my own version of 'right' like it's the only thing that's real.
i no longer take the most complicated route in solving a problem/ spat with someone or another.
i have all these newfound principles which i'm trying to live by. (i tried listing them out, but i've realized they develop as I develop. :)

and lastly, i prioritize happiness, as corny and unrealistic as that sounds.

so here's to going back to loving sandcastles and swings, having sticky fingers and snotty noses, and constantly stuffing on sugary treats!

... mm no wait, when i did i ever stop? O_O

edited/

found this on tumblr. perfect summary of this post.

31st

2010-08-01T01:15:00.000+08:00

day of farewell. (:

(havent had a 31st post in a very long time.)

worst week

2010-07-29T21:29:00.002+08:00

i've been having a really hell-ish week so far.

so bad it's disconcerting.

lets see, shall we?

Monday, first day of the week. also the day i missed my first ever Politics and Law class. which i have so been looking forward to.
need i mention i was the only goon to have missed said class? huh. guess not.
besides that, i also missed the specific instructions for the homework for that class- a 3 to 4 page essay on Democracy.

and to top it all off? the one class i've missed, the teacher has to be a part-time lecturer, which means the only time i get to apologize profusely for my absence is.. on Fri. our next class. :/

Tuesday saw me get into one of the worst fights EVER with my sister and mother. basically i'm currently disowned by both parties, by choice.

meaning i had/have to engineer my own means of transport to and fro Sunway on Fridays and Mondays and maybe Tuesdays?

Wednesday morning witnessed my unceremonious scramble from bed straight into the shower at 7.30. you see Yoke was coming to visit at 8 on Thursday, but i (as predicted) got the dates wrong. my Wednesday class starts at 10.30. i was ready by 7.45.

i know it doesnt seem like a big deal, but when every second of sleep is precious, you feel the burn. trust me. i was lucky enough to have the sense to call him before leaving my place, so no 2 and a half hours wait in college. phew.

and
Thursday (today) saw me boarding the wrong bus to college. which means i ended up in Taylors Subang.

:/

again, thankfully, Yoke was in Sunway already and fetched me to Sunway College.

you see what i mean? i feel like i'm walking on eggshells here! :S i mean, what are the odds of all of the above events happening consecutively? pretty slim i'd say.

and you know whats the MOST worrisome part?

the week is not over yet.

(this post will edited for developments on Fri. i dont believe in tainted weekends so i'm safe there, hopefully.)

of tattoos and tumblr

2010-07-25T15:54:00.000+08:00

because now, in my mind, the two invariably go together. (:

sadly, i will most probably never get a tat done, cause i'm shit afraid of needles. and pain. but it's still nice to imagine, no?

i have a strange affinity for snowflakes, peacocks, birds in general, flowers and the latest addition, turtles. (: oh and the colour green, but that's pretty obvious.

cute.

THIS is a nice colour tattoo.

(;

okay wait guys lookit what i found wei.

this guy looks like Ali! doesnt he doesnt he?! maybe it IS him!

O_O

The Happiest Day of my Life. (to date)

2010-07-22T23:31:00.003+08:00

first off, i would just like to begin by saying.. HALLELUJAH THERE IS INTERNET IN OUR HOSTEL ROOM NOW! and to be shared only by four people! exceeelllent! *wide toothy grin*

i DID have to wait from 3+ till 5 to get it installed tho. and it extended till 6 due to my Mac-cannot-find-IP-add issues. but no matter, it is here, and i am thrilled. :)

i thought i would honour the occasion by blogging about what was probably the Happiest Day of my Life, so far and until further notice.

my surprise farewell gathering.

pardon my soppy sentimentalization of it all, but it really was the Best Thing Anyone has ever done for me. again, so far and until further notice. (sorry, i cant make a irrevocable statement; i am incredibly superstitious. :( )

but yeah. it was like, the perfect surprise. you know how everyone (dont even try to deny it guys!) has fantasized about the perfect birthday surprise, how everyone special would be there. there'd be a few presents, a cake(!), candles..

let me just say, to everyone that couldn't make it, it was all that and more. :')

storytime!

XXX

so it was the last night for me in PJ and i was getting kind of emotional. i mean i had already accepted moving, but it didn't chase away the blues. :/ anyway, so Kun and I decide to go for dinner. Chillies, One Utama. Enchiladas and Honey Chipotle Chicken. same order everytime. :)'©™ < this moticon is supposed to symbolize a salivating face. and as you can see it's Original P juice, so you will be charged if misused.

alright, back to dinner. right before food comes, Kun tells me he has to be back early cause his parents want him home earlier to study. am a tad bit disappointed, but kinda relieved as well, cause i was VERY reluctant to go into the whole 'goodbye' mode, and the main point emphasized during the whole dinner was that the night had no special importance to it; it's just a dinner.

so we eat. at first things were going fine, alot of general talk about our day etc. and then he starts receiving a hell lot of calls. as if that's not kancong-ing enough, he leaves for a rather loong toilet trip. i say kancong because all these calls coming in? i was told they were from his parents. he forgot to pray for his mum, and she cant do it herself cause she has period.

i know right? LOLOLOL saddest part was that i believed it 100%. so basically i believed that his dad and mum were like calling every 15 minutes to yell at him to get home. panic much? so we gobbled/ inhaled our food, and almost ran out.

now those of you who know me know i dont like rushing my meals. so i wasnt the happiest girl at that moment la. no i wasnt. and to top it all off, he tells me RIGHT AFTER WE LEAVE CHILLIES, after a phonecall, that his dad can pray for his mum. so he doesnt have to rush back.

LOL. so yeah, we walk around for awhile, till about 2230-ish, then i head home.

and it turns out Yoke was at my place. waiting for me in the dark in his car. my fault really, cause previously in the afternoon i invited him over after training, but i had no idea his training would end so late. and the original plan was for Aik and Nat to come over and help me pack, but they never called/ showed up so i assumed they were busy. (turns out they were busy preparing this. awwwwh!) *blushes*

so Kun and i ruuushed back, and i brought the two boys up for dessert (or something. i didnt really know what to feed them at the time. ahaha)

then, at the doorstep of my house, Yoke realized he forgot his wallet in the car. eh wallet or watch. i cant remember. O_O must ask Kun, i'll reedit this. LOL.

but yeah, we'll assume it's his wallet first alright? so he asks Kun to go get it from the car with him. i was already IN my house, so, being the lazy me, i assumed the guys would go get the wallet themselves. i mean, i actually also needed to scour the house for food!

but, and till now im not sure how, they managed to get me in the lift with them. oh and before that my mum sliped Kun something suspicious, but he refused to show it to me. i didnt wanna make a scene in front of Yoke so i just let it slide. later i would find out that it was a knife. ~~for the cake.~~ :)

so anyway we were on our way down, and the lift ended up stopping at the 2nd floor (swimming pool) Yoke stepped out. with Kun. and AS USUAL being me, i thought they accidentally got off to the wrong floor, and i tried to close the door on them. lol.

then Yoke goes like "eh, kam here"
"Yoke, wth this isnt our floor la"
"just come la! *pulls my wrist*"

and omg on the floor at the lift lobby was a perfectly constructed heart made out of tealight candles. <3

SO SWEET!

and then Horng Qing pops out of nowhere! and starts to be generally the loud, head-prefect-y person he is; "HI PAULINE! LOOK IT'S A HEART. OMG ISNT IT NICE? EH PAULINE CAN YOU SEE IT'S A HEART?"

haha. and by that time i was already sobbing like a crazy person. then after HQ finished his tirade/ covering up for the whispering girls, people starting coming out from their various hiding places. singing Au Lang Syne.

*SNIFF SNIFF* DAMN TOUCHING MAN. seriously by that time i was crying so much i was almost blind. my eyes needed car wipers, uhuh they did.

and when i say people, i mean, PEOPLE. it was like my favourite people from all parts of my life were all there. scouts people/ besties- Nat, Yoke, HQ, Aaron, Wen Wen! primary school BFFS- Mei, Ash; DU people- Minn, NaomiOmi, Chen Sern, David, CHIP; and college buddy- the one and only and probably only college soulmate EVER, Nenlin!

and of course, the No 1s, Aik, Nee and Kun. :'D (minus a certain Australian)

it blew me off my feet. never in a million years could i have ever ever ever imagine/ fantasized all these people getting together at the same place, same time, to see me off. ever. every single person there, i've had a personal history with, which was what made it so special. it was so so so so touching and insanely nice, sweet, perfect- you name it. *tear glands slipping into overdrive*

and they came complete with homemade cheesecake, handmade picture board, picture frame, cupcakes, teddybear-Beary, more cupcakes.. *happy child grin*

here are some pictures. :)

that's supposed to be me. the wings and crown are a nice touch aik! (:E

aand. the legen-waitforit-dary picture board! :)

taadaaa!

tadaaaaaaa!

TADAAA!

and of course the lovely pictureframe made by the scouts. LOVE YOU GUYS!<3

TADAA

ISSA PEANUT

Left: Beary. from HQ and Aaron. :) (IT'S SO FLUFFY!) and Right: Cherry (stolen) from Joyce. lookit the two love-bears!

aand my study/ laptop table!

from LihWen. taadaaaa!~ love it so much. hardly do work on it tho cause i keep getting distracted by pics. LOL

yeah, thats LihWen. :P

she also gave me a pan, which i have not taken a pic of. (yet) soon to come. :)

and i also didnt manage to take a pic of Yoke's delicious cheesecake! he baked it with his own recipe, apparently. and he bought the ingredients! :)) OREO CHEESECAKE K. omg. *salivates* :)'

GROUP PICTURE. HELLO EVERYONE!

but seriously tho. thanks for coming everyone. it meant and still does mean so much to me. i hope you guys had fun for however long you were there. we should have more gatherings like this! you people make my world rock and roll. i love you all. :') nyaaaaahbigassgrouphug!

and lastly, special thanks to this person right here. without her, none of it would have happened, and i would have just like, left. :'( thanks for taking care of me and planning this for me. :'S even tho i explicitly told you not to! haha. i guess that's what best friends are for. :) and hats off, it really was so unexpected! and so well planned!!!! :')

the thing that hit me the most was the heart thing, cause that was so early on, and i didnt know things were already in motion then. :') and right under my nose! :'')

i never really got the chance to thank you, cause i didnt wanna lose my cool (fail) during the goodbyes, but THANKS AIK. you take care of me, all the time. and i wanna be as good a friend as you to me. it's gonna be hard, but i'll try my best. *hugs*

love you.

home sweet home tomorrow. yay. (:

nights everyone.

(doing this post has made me miss home.)

no rhyme or reason

2010-07-18T21:46:00.003+08:00

looks a little like templers park. someone please get married there already so we can recreate the effect. :)

love this.

non highlighted? LIES

TRUTH

really.

xxx

all our petty little problems. we can do this.

life at Sunway, so far. with colour!

2010-07-15T21:27:00.002+08:00

it's time! the hostel/ friends post!
therefore these handsome buildings must be the beloved hostel i keep rambling on and on about. behold- Casa Subang.

and this is me inside our unit. A-03-10, first unit to the left of the lifts. living room with the couch set. haha, it's pretty barren otherwise.

oh okay one more with the living room window. faces Mydin's carpark, which is actually the better view. (alternative would be facing the factory :/)

and this is our room! (that's Jenani, roomie)

and this is our toilet. tadaa! only shared between us two girls. and attached to our room. :) with a heater which is a huge plus point. :D

our long conjoined study table. i might just study on the table outside (there is a study table in the living room) cause this just doesnt look very conducive. we'll see la. maybe after i add a table lamp and maybe one more table fan. (yeah, no ceiling fan)

main door, shoe rack, Waina's room (she was changing so no picture of the interior) and Ainaa and Waina's toilet. (shared between the both of them as well) remember, only 4 people per unit. for ours at least :)

Ainaa's room. yes much bigger than Jen and mine's. but i guess it works out cause we can go back anytime, and these are actually their like, real homes.

in kitchen by fridge. the electric stoves dont work, but it doesnt really effect us as we dont cook, so no biggie.
OMG WHY DO I KEEP TAKING PICTURES IN PAJAMA PANTS. ahah. ha. *hides face*

wet area.

okay moving on to people i have met/ hung out with/ and somehow, on some level, bonded with.

green is KahYung, only DU doing Law in AUSMAT. my 'Homie' (no seriously, that's his name in my phonebook)

and Red with glasses is JOEL JUSTIN. say hellooo Joel! Joel's from Sarawak and has become one of my closest friends there. we laugh ourselves stupid at the same things and both are uncommonly dramatic. *insert wildly gesturing hands and wide surprised eyes* (had to enlarge picture cause it's the only one i have of his face. ambushed him)

aand that's Keefe! KEEFIE! haha Keefe says the weirdest things at the weirdest moments. he reminds me slightly of a huge Asian teddy bear. he actually gave KahYung an impromptu hug in the middle of our dinner outing cause of KahYung's captioned tee. LOL.

and this is Waaaina!!!! i love Waina to bits. she is so cute and fair and adorable. <3 takes Accounting with Jen. she's from Putrajaya/ Terengganu and guess what? her dad is the Agung's assistant person. how cool is that?! not as cool as the fact that she has won Malay traditional dance choreographing competition(s)! and has the Gold medal for the Anugerah Pengakap Perdana (if i'm not mistaken). SCOUTS take a good look at our future traditional dance teacher! :)

i dont have a picture of Ainaa cause she's always without her tudung in the house. :( but no worries, there will be many more opportunities to snap a picture with her. or two. hee.

lastly, my roomie, Jen! phew thank goodness for HELP man. helps sharing a room with someone i know (and like. :) and it's extra awesome that we mix so well together (JPJK- joel, pauline, jen, keefe) i dont see her much tho! it's cause of the difference in classes. we dont have a single class together, and Jen is only around the hostel on Tues nights.

i'm no better actually. i'm only staying at the hostel two nights a week this month. this is actually cause i only have 3 days of college a week for July! (no more LAN for me. :)

but yeah. that's a glimpse into my life in Sunway. looks promising, and because of the people i have met there, interesting. :D

so i guess that's it from me, for now.

off to visit my beloved. PEANUT HERE I COME! *rubs hands in glee*

tata people. it's good to be home.

a chair is still a chair

2010-07-12T23:40:00.000+08:00

leaving tomorrow for college and then a two nights stay at the hostel. (i dont have class on Mon and Fri this month, so it's a super long weekend for me for now. <3)

long pants and feet (as seen above) are symbolic 'cause over there people seem to NEVER wear shorts, so to avoid looking out of place i've been conforming to long pants/jeans everyday as well. and feet cause, well, i'm leaving. :'(

sigh. stock up on storybooks P.

2010-07-11T00:03:00.001+08:00

OMGOSH THERE IS AN EFFING ANT NEST HANGING JUST INSIDE MY DOORWAY.

OMGOSH F WEI.

if you dont know, i have this things for ants. one or two or three- fine. but a whole battalion of them and i will spray so help me BigMan.
in fact, i only NOT spray ants when.. we run out of Ridsect. or if i'm in camp. should it be the latter, i look AWAY and steadily ignore line of crawling tiny ants.

i believe my intense dislike for these creatures stems from my friendship with a certain Elisha Sufian. charming girl, very sweet. however- key point - hated ants to their very core. it was she who ~~taught~~ told me that if a person were to consume ants in water then that said individual would suffer from poor memory retention. and you know what? i believe her.

not to mention the sight of a billion disgusting red/ black/ white ants is just enough to raise bile. HURL I TELL YOU. mygosh seriously just talking about it gives me the creeps. ngahblahblugheduh

okay. breathe. time to crank open a fresh new can of Ridsect.
nose has started to water involuntarily, but that just means it's working. ;)

can you edit crap?

2010-07-08T22:23:00.003+08:00

YES YOU CAN! because i have somehow (YAY) managed to fix my template problem! hallelujah! am surprisingly pleased with my new layout. it seems fresher, spacier somehow. :)

mm, the irrational joy i feel reminds me somewhat of the younger Form 3 me; obsessed with my blog and all the fancy IT editing that comes with it. i've always loved having something that's mine, and only mine. something that can be bedazzled and decorated in true blue P style. ;)

HEE so happy. am going to buzz off to continuously refresh this page. baai!

XXX

crap crap crap crap. accidentally deleted my template whilst experimenting with the new ones. CRAP.

PLEASE SOMEONE ANYONE help me narrow down the effing new templates. they all have a scroll bar at the BOTTOM of each template which PISSES ME OFF.

*stares at erratic caps* too much 'Nenlin' influence. *shakes head*

on a side note: must proofread posts in the future. in post below, so was typed out as saw. very confusing. my fingers have a mind of their own i tell you!

kkthxbye. (:

i'm back. for a heartbeat.

2010-07-06T16:17:00.001+08:00

so i'm back from Sunway for awhile. (today till tomorrow; for my dad's birthday)

for those that don't know, i've moved to the Sunway hostel for the duration of my AUSMAT, which is 18 months starting this July. reason WHY i've moved is because i managed (somehow) to land the JPA scholarship offer for Law in Australia.

anyway, am going to update on recent happenings as fast as i can as my time at home is as precious as it is limited! :/

so, orientation started on Fri, where we also received our first JPA briefing. JPA needs to stop throwing hidden darts out of the dark, cause there is only so much we can take. :/

turns out we are only allowed to apply for 3 universities in Australia; those in the Group of 8 that allow direct entry for a single law degree. and those universities are:- University of Queensland, Monash University and the University of Adelaide.

as you may have noticed, the top 3 universities in Australia aren't there. that, is a huge bummer. i mean, because we have already settled for doing law in Australia, but now to not be able to do it at the BEST places there?! unimaginable. ...:( but it's okay, because somehow over the course of the weekend i have grown to accept it. barely, but at least i've stopped complaining. (much. LOL)

bombshell aside, my hostel unit is.. fine. didnt exceed expectations much, aside from unit size (comfortable), unit location (3rd floor) and housemates (4 a unit and not 7! :). ooh and having to share a toilet with only Jen was an upside as well.

did not expect the abandoned-type-dirty state it would come in tho! there were dead cockroaches in the middle of the floor, live cockroaches scurrying around in between drawers and below tables/ beds, rotten sink cupboards; lizard shit by the millions, black mattresses and a flithy as hell room fan. O_O

took a whole day of intense cleaning *scrub scrub wipe wipe* but now it's clean enough for me to lie on the floor! *stretches like Peanut* :)

but as homey and as comfortable as it has to potential to be, i miss home everytime i wake up in the mornings. when i'm literally stagnant at the hostel lazing around- i miss home. when i lie in my new bed at night- i miss home.

maybe not home so much as the people at home.

sigh. okay NO EMO TIME NOW. must. utilize. time. at. home. :D ps: classes officially start on Wed.

Convo with Nee about me cutting Yoke's hair

2010-06-28T21:13:00.001+08:00

hey, btw, did i tell you i cut Yoke's hair today?

DUDE!

wait wait. neeraj, best friend approach.. now.

you can cut my hair too.

thanks. okay, realistically?

YOU ARE NEVER TOUCHING MY HAIR.

ahahahahahahahahaha

btw, the haircut went good okay!!! part 2 tomorrow. LOL

2010-06-28T20:10:00.002+08:00

found this on su-zen's tumblr. is it not the most hilarious shit ever?!

Redang - short and sweet

2010-06-24T22:07:00.001+08:00

i'm back from Redang!

(i dont think this is new as i am pretty sure my facebook account is much more popular than my blog, if anyone even still reads this. HEH)

anyway, quirky things to remember about the lovely people who went for the trip:-
merlephant keshayshay
horngqing nip nips
bullshit button aaron
laughing button natasha
perfect pauline ;)
sleepy nicholas. LOL

man, it really was a spectacularly fun holiday.
the beach was picturesque, the weather nice and sunny (despite the rain on the 1st morning), the snorkeling (esp the first trip- Pulau Kerrenga- or something like that) beyond belief (who knew there really WAS a whole world beneath the waves?!) and lastly, the people huge fun. :)

even the 8 hour wait for the 6 hour journey back was entertaining. i smile when browsing through every picture, good or bad, and i think that- above all - allows me to truly appreciate the fun i had there.

my excitement on the ferry, the unadulterated delight on reaching the island(!) beautiful beautiful beautiful!, my discontentment with the food, the excitement and absolutely overwhelming awe when i first dipped my face mask into the underwater world during my first ever snorkeling trip, the thrill of taking beautiful pictures, baby turtles, night walks, midnight dances and lastly, the quiet sadness of leaving.

sigh. retain the memories P, retain the memories.

xxx

on another note, misspelt yet ANOTHER common word again. compulsAry much? jeez. i am spelling so many things wrong nowadays that i am beginning to seriously doubt my 'ironclad conviction' in my ambition of becoming a lawyer. i mean, maybe being a durian seller isn't THAT bad.

hmm.

yeahokaywhatever, going off to pack.
no no, not for Sunway; going for Manikayu Part 1 tomorrow till Sun. :'(
goodbye last weekend home.

tara.

My very first blood test. :)

2010-06-16T15:17:00.003+08:00

over the years, i realized (gradually) that i have an irrational fear of people physically hurting me/ others.

i simply cannot stomach an episode/ episode trailer for NipandTuck or the surgery bits of Greys Anatomy. i can't stand the sight of tearing flesh and a scalpel. and of course..

i can't bear needles.

in Form 3, i was (so far, as i have heard) the only noobass that cried before taking her wtvitwas jab. i kept jerking away, tensing and begging the nurse to 'promise not to hurt me.' i kid you not.

so when i saw the JPA medical checkup list and found that it included a compulsory blood test, i freaked.
extracting blood is something i've avoided like the plague since forever. and finally, doomsday (the way i react, it's not an exaggeration, serious) has arrived. *jeng jeng jeng* O_O

so i decided to get the inevitable horror over with as speedily as possible by do it the very next day (today). because NO WAY i would be able to enjoy redang knowing i would have come back and puncture myself. heh.

so today has come and gone. imma spare you the embarrassing details of me wincing and freaking at the table and leave you with the knowledge that

I DID IT.

i squeezed me some Pauline juice and i didnt cry. :))) i was/ am so insanely proud of myself. needle obstacle- passed! :D

... and that euphoria lasted apprx as long as it took for the nurse to inform me tht i have to come back on mon for a second jab. excellent lah. :'(

nothing is as it seems

2010-06-16T01:47:00.005+08:00

despair and anguish. fancy words with heavy meaning.

2010-06-15T22:25:00.002+08:00

too close for comfort

2010-06-13T18:17:00.000+08:00

faith is like bricks. you build up a wall of it to shield you from the ugly, the feared, the destruction. and that wall helps you feel secure, safe.

but we occasionally (if not constantly) forget about the cement holding the bricks together. and that, is reality.

reality is a fickle creature. sometimes it's a friend, and sometimes the enemy. and when it does turn it's back on you, when it works against you; that 'brick wall' of faith? it comes crashing down.

because sometimes all the faith in the world isn't enough the stop the wave of heartbreaking, overwhelming reality. the convictions, the firmly held beliefs, they all fall apart backed by nothing but fanciful thinking, instead of solid, concrete facts of life.

i always assumed it to be the other way round. the glue that holds reality together being faith. because, well, faith is what held me together.

needless to say, i have been proven wrong.

I am 18. it is time for me to stop being a 'believer.' life is tough, so be tougher.

not gonna lie to you, i'm scared. i see the end in everything i do nowadays.

when i go out for dinner, yumcha, mamaks, movies the inevitable thought-speech bubble always pops up in my head.

"this could be your last time"

and it's true! that could have been my last time going to Ikea for meatballs with Kun after a late night movie.

that could have been the last time i have the luxury of using the house phone to call Nee for advice.

that could have been my last time sitting in HorngQing's car for scouts.

hell, that could have been the last time i have the liberty of attending these random scouts outings.

this could be the last few times you can go swimming whenever you please.

this could be the last time you get to watch StarWorld's comedy marathons with the house to yourself.

this could be the last time you get to bath in hot water! (okay, a little absurd, but NOT impossible)

well, you can imagine lah.

'cause i know 3 weeks isn't a very long time. it can/will pass in a blink of an eye. and when it does..

yeah well. i am not ready.

two new versions of google!

2010-06-10T17:41:00.000+08:00

omg CHECK THESE OUT MAN.

Epic Google

and his brother

Weenie Google

these are NOT spam pages but instead actual Google pages. epic awesome is what i say!! :D

2010-06-10T00:28:00.001+08:00

i have soo much to tell the world right now. so much to express!

lets see.. i have:-

my thankfulness for all the wonderful things happening in my life/ being handed to me on a platter that i am not entirely sure is silver, but in hindsight does not matter..(?)

my anguish at being ripped apart from the things i have come to love; new-special-shiny things, for that matter.

my confusion and worry about starting anew. (and i dont just mean the new college. there is a hidden grenade of discomfort i have yet to fling out.)

aand lastly my happiness for the recent ending of the recent exams. rejoice! :D

and after i express all that, i need to find a way to tell the world (eloquently if possible) how they are all connected, all these emotions, however conflicting they are.

going off on a childish tangent 'ere.. it's something like i'm happy but sad but worried but thankful but SAD but confused but but BUT omfgjustshutupalready! you know?

hmm.

anywayy, how about a picture to brighten up the post? (:

this is me. eating an oyster- for the very first time. glad to say i absolutely loved it. Kun's bday 2010.

lastly, i guess the most important 'thing' i need to settle is the compilation of a list of some sort of all the things i want to do before i start my AUSMAT experience on July 2nd.

okay, time to welcome iTunes back into my life. (: bye.

440

2010-06-08T01:34:00.003+08:00

Doesn’t being scared let you know you’re on to something important? If you’re not scared, you’re not taking a chance. If you’re not taking a chance then what the hell are you doing?
-anonymous

just had a rather late nightcap with Kun at Coffee Bean. it's interesting- trying to familiarize myself with his lifestyle, his habits. :)

and i need to tell David that a Red Velvet cake isn't heaven on earth, but merely.. an average cake. only red. :/

also, candied ginger, as romantic and as delicious as it sounds, sadly does not live up to expectations. and as illogical as it seems, that disappointment was heavier on my heart than i imagined it would be. it's just like realizing that (whispers) enid blyton stories are just a sham. :'(

you know, i don't know why our generation hasn't been hit by a severe wave of depression. we lived on those stories! (didn't we?) i mean, first it was the salt to catch sparrows myth , then the sailor doll's pant- clear weather myth ; recently i figured out that hedgehogs DONT drink milk, but instead eat dog food (!) how heartbreaking is that?!

sigh. okay enough rambling. icecream time. <3 = not a heart shape but an ice cream cone. ahahahah

oh and ps: Zu i miss you terribly much. we should go lunch soon. after Zara's exams alright? *hugs

k guy, i'll leave you with a chart of truth. one of the few i managed to find on tumblr anyway.

enjoy. (:

distractsyen

2010-06-02T01:53:00.002+08:00

today, Kun said that maybe i shouldn't sing in public anymore. :O

i is sad.

plus side?
my cramps have arrived and with them all their.. perks.
and Birdie died. :'( (some random bird we saved from the lift lobby of my place. rm50 and a day later- it passed. seriously fml.)

oh wait those aren't plus points.
hmm.

i think the whole point of this post is actually to keep my mind of the King Scout letter that's been weighing down on my mind. i do not want to do 40 km again. i do not want to do 40 km. i do want to do. i do not want to. i do not want. i do not. do.

NGAH.

2010-06-01T03:41:00.001+08:00

unique observation:-

taken with my darling Ixus. which doesnt really fare well under weak lighting. besides the point, cause some SLR flashed us at that precise moment. ps look at how slitty and teeny my eyes were!

okay now lookit this one:-

this was taken at the EXACT same moment with the said SLR. look at how wide my eyes actually are!

kinda amazing. maybe i should take ALL my pictures like that. from the side, unsuspectingly. ;)

Dear You,

2010-05-30T01:43:00.003+08:00

was feeling a little.. outofplace today.
happened after. you know, after, when you stop and just THINK. when your brain has the time to process and isnt in its just-go mode.

yeah thats why people like Ashvin say i process emotions slow. and it always (almost) works out so i get angry/outraged much later. is it odd that my sense of injustice is my most delayed emotion when i'm planning to be a lawyer? *worried*

so yeah i was feeling outofplace. and then.. you call.
and i knooow its expensive and i knooow i shouldnt tell you most things since it involves you and i should try to protect your feelings and stuff, buttt you are the person i consult when problems/ complications occur- so yeah. plus the fact i wasnt thinking cause i was feeling outofplace.
what i didnt expect was your reaction to it all.

i love how you dont care about what people say about you. about us.

i love how you are so calm and rational.

i love how you continue to prove my doubts wrong.

how one phonecall allows me to realize that no matter what i say/ think/ feel about you- about all your shortcomings, there is a reason we're together.

you are the complete opposite of who i am (in all the good ways and bad) but maybe thats a good thing. chalk and cheese in a good way. peanutbutter and jam- maybe. all i know is that i love this lightweight-epiphany feeling, and i need to lock it down. (we all know why).
i might change my mind tomorrow (very possible) but all that matters is that i lock down what i am feeling now. the feeling of Belonging. [insert contented smiley]

random tangents strolling across my plane of thought- in ps form of course:-

ps: i dont do strangers very well. how la will i survive in Sunway?
double ps: i find D and E damn cute lah. ;D letsa go dinner in KL soon.
triple ps: wow i miss hanging out with cheryl and MEI haha things like buying the towel and all remind me of when we used to go OU with Jou. :')
quadruple ps: happybirthday LuMay. <3- hope you are epic happy, you deserve it. *hugs* (dont think you will see this here, so i'll just tell you in person when i see you. lol)

...wow. my blog is so personal. maybe i should just shuta it down and start a diary.

*

2010-05-25T02:15:00.002+08:00

i used to be so sarcastic. and funny.

what the hell happened to that?

age. experience. life.

i also used to be overly emotional about everything. well, almost everything.

why won't that go away?

gender. upbringing. personalwellbeing.

--

sigh.

*this is a filler post based on emotion/ frustration (which is actually also an emotion) and ~~indecision~~ patience. i will document one of the hardest decisions of my life in a bit. not now, but in a bit. wait for it, please.

2010-05-20T22:36:00.000+08:00

from plantsaretakingover.tumblr.com. pretty awesome eh?

and i'm sitting here thinking- who AM i?

2010-05-18T01:52:00.004+08:00

i'm 18, and have been for a few months now.

and honestly? my life is nowhere near where i thought it would be.

and here are some random thoughts flitting around like moths in my befuddled head. yeh not butterflies- moths. all dark-winged and mysterious. much like moving shadows with wings. ohlordiamsleepy.

well here goes:-

i didnt think i'd be this out of place at college (i am, sometimes. sometimes by choice, and sometimes not. as painful as it is to admit.)
on the same note- i didnt know i'd be this reclusive.
actually, i didnt expect making friends to be this hard. you know you think that you've finally found someone nice to be friends with, and then they go say/ do something totally against your principles or be generally quite a ass.
i didnt know i'd own a blog. and even if i did, i always imagined, no fantasized, that it'd be long and extremely wordy- like a mini novel.
i didnt think i'd be attached, let alone almost-engaged to someone- and for this long. i always envisioned myself 18, young and still looking.
i didnt think i'd lack so much style.
i didnt think i would be typing with my veryown laptop. or that it'd be one this amazing.
i didnt think i would stalk people on facebook.
i probably didnt expect my 18 year old self to own a facebook account. (i was, and still am, pretty nerdish.)
i didnt expect to have to still have so many friends from primary school come to Du with me, and still be with our core group.
i didnt expect to have best friends NOT from my primary school. but i do, and i love them.
i didnt expect certain special friendships to take so much effort and diligence to maintain. and i certainly didnt expect to treated like before.
actually, truth is.. i didnt expect to be the nerd.
i didnt know i wouldnt make it Big in highschool
i didnt know i'd have the guts to Try to be Somebody in college. SASA elections were a surprise to me, myself and I.
i didnt think i wouldnt be actively trying to venture back into media. i really loved it, but lost the guts.
i didnt think/know/ ever believed i could ever represent my school on sports.
i didnt think i'd EVER join scouts. enough said. haha.
i never expected myself to take that leap of faith and- bet you've guessed it- go for King Scout. always assumed my parents would stand in the way or that i'd be too darn lazy, or that i'd chicken out halfway.
i didnt think i'd have the guts to try to drive.
i never thought i'd own my own room.
i never thought i'd be afraid to speak up. eventually shying away from debate. i always was the mouthy one.
i didnt know i would secretly pit myself against successful peers and be depressed when they are better than me. that is kinda weak- but i do it. maybe to motivate myself. maybe, who knows.
i didnt know i'd lack the self confidence so that it'd still hurt when people are nasty or mean and sarcastic.
i didnt know i'd begin to STUTTER.
and i sure as hell didnt know i still would not have figured myself out yet. who i am and who i wanna be. not the slightest clue.

hmm. i have tons more, but my flu medicine is starting to take its toll. i am so serious that its pretty frightening. my eyelids are drooping as i type. wow, this may be my first post 'under the influence'.

- basically, at this point in my life, i actually thought i would have it pretty sorted out. i expected to be 'on track.' but i am not. and in some ways, thats a great thing. some ways not so much.

all i know is that saying that Life doesnt always go as planned is pretty solid crap.

because Life never goes as planned.

and i want to figure myself out. to get my game plan going. but as lame as it sounds- and i know it sounds lame- i dont have the time. nor the energy.

not tonight anyway.

yeah, this is why i love my blog.

2010-05-12T23:19:00.000+08:00

"you know the other day, when i was feeding Molly grapes.."

"WHAT? you feed Molly grapes?! you've never fed ME grapes."

"oh. heh. heh."

that 8 titted son uv a.

it's like a cyber snackbar.

2010-05-09T20:52:00.001+08:00

study break is here! two long luxurious weeks to cram. (or catch up on sleep/ complete metamorphosis of becoming a pig)

have decided to not blog about king scout YET. until the letter comes out. cause how i am feeling about king scout generally depends on the sukacita/ dukacita that the letter carries. actually, however the coin flips, i DO believe i did my best and i am proud of myself thus far. *pats own back* good job soldier. LOL.

oh oh and just completed my 6 hour amali today, where i met Natasha Balqis again for like the first time in a million years! made me realize that people can do a complete 360 change in a mere 5 years! like seriously, she was unrecognizable. (: so today wasn't a complete and total waste of time- instead i found a really old friend and managed to use like, 3 hours catching up. <3

okaay then before i leave (i know, you're probably like "whaaat? already??"), i just wanted to share with you all something that happened to me at HELP University College's common room level 2.
- it's not that i dont love the place, its just that some people can be such psychopaths!

basically i just finished law mocks right, and went to sit down with David Peters, Mark Koh and Natalie Liew, when suddenly my right cheek (yes ass) gets this really sharp piercing pain. and i'm like whathehell? did i leave something in my pocket?- so i got up and checked my ass.
eh. no pockets also?
*looks down at seat*
and whaaat do i see? two pins stuck with chewing gum so they are standing vertically upwards, pointy ends UP as a sick, demented booby trap. like, two loong pins. the type used for cork boards. :X

WHO WOULD DO SOMETHING LIKE THAT? JEEZ.

asswipes!

anyway, I am fine, but my demeanor is severely shaken. (and one ass may now be smaller than the other) and i now urge all students of HELP to be very wary and cautious. we mingle with some very twisted people, people!

ps: i hacked away at my hair to produce a fringe. again. finally. LOL.
double ps: IP MAN yesterday was very very nice. movie again soon guys! (:

k, see everyone soonish. bai!

true that, colbie.

2010-04-21T22:06:00.002+08:00

warning: corny post below.

I miss those blue eyes

How you kiss me at night

I miss the way we sleep

Like there's no sunrise

Like the taste of your smile

I miss the way we breathe

But I never told you

What I should have said

No, I never told you

I just held it in

And now,

I miss everything about you

Can't believe that I still want you

And after all the things we've been through

I miss everything about you

Without you

I see your blue eyes

Everytime I close mine

You make it hard to see

Where I belong to

When I'm not around you

It's like I'm alone with me

But I never told you

What I should have said

No, I never told you

I just held it in

And now,

I miss everything about you

Can't believe that I still want you

And after all the things we've been through

I miss everything about you

its songs like these that remind me that *squeamish* loving someone isn't always about the outward signs of affection; the hugs and kisses.

its about the missing and that special thing you share. a feeling that tends to grow with time and experience. a feeling not so pleasant as it amplifies when we're apart. :/

- this post is for the times i get caught up with the new 'love bug' floating around in college. happy i have something solid to come home to.

king. scout. soon. zapin and names now. scared scared scared. cry.

2010-04-19T22:54:00.000+08:00

thank you, for the postcard that made my day.

it nearly made me cry; happy tears but still. :')

so thank you. (you know who you are)

you're the best.

sending my love to Sam from Malaysia,

2010-04-12T21:22:00.003+08:00

Liz hopes a Valentine's Day root canal will make her feel better about being alone. Jack goes after an attractive CNBC host. Jenna is crushed when a stalker stops stalking her.

this is a summary of a basic 30 Rock episode. yes, you are missing out. ;)

ps: camp was.. i miss it la, safe to say. details when some kind soul uploads pics.

double ps: had Tutti Fruitti for the first time today, and did not know it was based on weight. spent a good RM 18 on ice cream i didnt really feel like having. FML.

cheers folks.

2010-04-06T22:28:00.001+08:00

concerning the previous post: i dont wanna be an emo child no more.
but i wont delete it because that is not the way i roll. let it just suffice to say tht all immediate problems in that period of time are over, and now i'm facing a whole new set. feeling.. queasy but fine about it. because that is Life right? :/

Ps, look what i stumbled upon.

homgosh, so efficiently categorized. all that remains is placing myself, truthfully. because theres no denying i belong somewhere in that diagram. *gulps*

when you start to hate- life.

2010-04-03T23:48:00.003+08:00

today, i have been having what most people refer to as- a shit day.

let me share. (journal like entry alert)

worked the whole day right from 8 (which came with its own little packet of drama which i am not ready to discuss in public-yet) and came home dead beat ready to do my assignments only to realize i left my file.. somewhere.
located said file and tried hopelessly to finish work without notes. considering it is a law assignment.. yeah, not so successful. tried to maintain some semblance of composure, and before i could catch my breath, i get a few rather unpleasant surprises which leave me feeling choked, angry and defeated. yes, i have just realized its leave, not left.

but i did try. i did try to turn it all around.

after sleeping for a precious hour, i then dragged my sorry ass to a friend's house to celebrate his birthday, only to have to wait in the car for half an hour while my boyfriend gets ragged on by his father; while i feel like the worst person in the world. best part? when the birthday kid finally arrives, i belatedly realize me being was not the best of ideas. putting it bluntly here.

I really could not be fucked, because guess what? I have to work from 9-5 tomorrow- alone for half the day. *toucheswoodinvain*

in short, the only highlight of my day was seeing Kun and talking to Nee. because sometimes, i feel like the whole damn world doesnt understand. Anything. Like theres a anvil permanently stuck to my chest, crushing me. (altho this would be impossible due to gravity). times like today. and possibly tomorrow. in times like these, i wonder how the world can be so fake and hypocritical.
i dont like myself like this. i tend to judge and be.. too honest in my judgements. maybe i can argue and say i have better clarity in this particular mindset. whatever. its like, when you have no time for niceties. and you just say what you feel. and you have no patience for bullshit. and you just walk away. ya know?

ah well, as long as i can take something out of it, i will. whether it be the knowledge to not give a shit about certain people, to stay away from others while upset, or even to just accept. Everything. Knowing you can do Nothing.- at least that's something.

rockafella

2010-04-03T00:21:00.001+08:00

the process of painting my header, which was a present to the best friend (Neeraj). :)

anywaaay, had free time on my hands, therefore decided to revamp my blog! its not the perfect shade of green, but then again nothing is ever perfect. (lame excuse, but it works)

might need help from suzen on margins and normal boring details like that. :/

ps: i did not actually have free time, i merely conveniently forgot my law assignment. HEH.

okay, sasa tomorrow and the day after. gotta run.. and sleep. ;) bye people. and robots. (too much 30Rock!)

2010-03-29T23:20:00.002+08:00

*taps the world on the back*

please. stop. moving.

MUNC and Life.

2010-03-28T21:29:00.004+08:00

isn't this pretty? reblogged from Lee Jou Yin.

anyway, MUNC is over. thats means its goodbye to another super hectic weekend, hello to another week of (almost but not really) mundane week of college where undoubtedly assignments will starts piling up and be carried forward till the (what would otherwise be relaxed) weekend, where the whole cycles repeats itself, again.

yes, i think the statement aboves calls for a SIGH. (a week closer to Pentarafan as well, so yeah)

okay, pessisism later! updates of MUNC first please!
HELP MUNC? found it to be a reasonably enlightening experience. :D
dont think its something i would Love, but definitely something i Like. i prefer debates as they are more.. fast paced? and i hate the no follow up to a second degree thing MUN has got going on. but aside from that, it IS fun to represent a country other than your own, and the research is much more simpler than in a debate. there is also no preparing for both sides, so research wise, its basically much much simpler. and it's less intense than a debate, so less pressure. *wipes sweat*

Anyways, represented Indonesia, and its so incredibly ironic because there were actually two genuine-just-flew-in Indonesia people there! but they weren't in HRights Council and i only found out on the 3rd day AFTER Plenary so.. phew. haha.

people in MUNCs (regulars) are really people to watch out for tho. it does take alot of knowledge, guts and 'yeng'ness to be able to do MUNC like a pro. its meeting people like that that would make me wanna try it again. i guess we'll see, as quoted by Nigeria. ;)

met Grace and Ruiz there too! in HRights Council, may i add. sitting beside/ in front of me, may i add ON. :D and i wanna say we ReConnected but i dont think ive ever connected with these two particular people before, so im going to say we Connected! its so weird, cause i've always been intimidated both of them cause they are both like, geniuses sent down from Planet.. Genius (i am not the sharpest tool in the shed), but realized they are actually two really.. nice people. Ruiz volunteered to eat my ant-infested bread and Grace called me an angel! *beams and pats own back* <- i have no shame.

no really, its things like this which allow to me appreciate what i have, and how, with a simple change in perspective, life can be so much more Fun. happy i took the initiative to get out of my little bubble of comfort and try this HELP MUNC thing. it's always been something i have wanted to try, and i am so glad i did.

i suppose its when you stop focusing on the minute problems and start taking a peep at the bigger picture (albeit a little risky) and start making a change, not to the people around you, but focused at yourself, can you really make a difference. its like, when fighting with Bff AL, when i just decided to LetItGo, things just start to work themselves out. revelation? indeed.

so people, i think i may just have discovered one of life's biggest mysteries. the Answer to the Question. taking the ball and basically.. running with it.

so yeah, i'm going to continue running folks. and hopefully, i never reach the finish line. :D (nike ripoff but wtvz!)

this is me, happy.

ps: i like posts like this, all wordy and stuff. keeps in line with my title. yes/ no?
double ps: hopefully i'll find the time to update on my awesome birthday and if i can, spm results. oh and to Wee and Jou, JUST read your mails, and will reply when life starts settling. right now its still in the liquid agar stage, so.. wait for me! *hugs

okay, this delegate of Indonesia shall leave to focus on Indonesia's impending maths crisis. see ya bitches!

2010-03-26T22:16:00.000+08:00

but you are home. <3

dawai limau

2010-03-17T23:25:00.000+08:00

i have just downloaded limewire, and the first song i downloaded is Vanilla Twilight by Owl City. i have no idea why but it's.. perfect.

i am so contented right now you cant even begin to guess.

i'll taste the sky and feel alive again,
P

(ps: any comments on limewire? planning on countering the laggy-ness with an external hard drive. bole?)

2010-03-13T23:37:00.001+08:00

today i realized you can only depend on Yourself. and that love at our age is superficial, be it friendship-love or relationship-love. everyone disappoints in the end.

Tough realization. even tougher to live with.

whatf***ingever.

i'm too old to be having these breakdowns.

2010-03-11T09:20:00.000+08:00

wo hen pa.

when its time to live and let die

2010-03-04T23:51:00.001+08:00

as a blogger, i have failed miserably. because, despite college being easier to cope with (its true all you high schoolers, college is much more chilled), i can never seem to find the time to sit down, flex my fingers, and just.. blog.

its not that nothing interesting has been happening, its only that i never have the time, nor the initiative. so now i'm going to list down all the stuff i feel worthy of mentioning (those i can remember, at least) so i can look back and read something new whenever i open this blog page. heh.

i have, surprisingly, despite it being the 3rd month of college, made new acquaintances- soon to be friends.
no two single people i have met have the same personality. it's wonderful.
i do not like some people i have met, but not too strongly, thankfully.
people i have almost never spoken to in high school are now friends. thats happy-fying. :D
i can finally say i have metrosexual guy pals.
my paranoia has definitely scaled a few notches. and i actually think age is the factor.
i find myself alone in college sometimes, and i actually like it.
wednesday and tuesday lunches make my week.
i love seeing two new people in love, despite the pangs my achy-breaky heart gets.
i think i may be gradually losing my superstitious side. huh.

you know, as short as that was, i am completely satisfied.
okay, time to vanish into thin air, as i so often do to this place.

tara.

MLIA

2010-02-22T23:05:00.000+08:00

Today, we heard loud noises coming from the hall and went out to investigate. Apparently, the bathroom down the hall from our dorm room had flooded and someone was taping up a sign of linked copy paper that read, "The Chamber of Secrets Has Been Opened." When I turned back to my roommate to laugh with her, I saw she was gone. She had run back to our room to grab her stuffed cat to hang along with the banner. She said, "It wasn't complete without Mrs. Norris." MLIA

Today, I was trying to persuade my class of second graders to buy a copy of the class picture. I told them it would be nice to look at it when they're grown up and say things like "There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer," and "That's Michael, he's a doctor now." A small voice in the back of the room rang out, "And there's the teacher, she's dead." MLIA

Today, my friend expressed a wish that she could send texts with her voice talking instead of typed words. We informed her that that is called a phone call. MLIA

Today as I was walking across campus, i jokingly yelled "Accio water bottle". Two seconds later a water bottle hit me in the face. The guy walking ahead of me had thrown it when he heard the spell, came running over, pointed at my cut and yelled Episky. I have a new best friend. MLIA.

Today I was doing the ironing for my parents. I reached across the front of the iron to get a shirt and my elbow touched the iron. I screamed bloody murder. I then realised it was never even on in the first place. MLIA

Today, I was sitting in the car with my girlfriend when the full moon came out. The fact that we both started screaming and acting as though we were turning into werewolves tells me that we're going to be together for a very long time. MLIA.

Today it was raining hard all day long so my mom gave her phone to my sister to text me to drive safely. How do I know it was my sister? The text read "Drive as fast as you can and hit as many cars possible." MLIA

Today I was in traffic when I realised I was behind a Black Jeep Cherokee with the license plate "BAA BAA". To the driver of BAA BAA Black Jeep, I like your style ... MLIA

wow, 2512 pages of pure pick-me-up. :D

some will win, some will lose.

2010-02-17T23:58:00.000+08:00

oh gosh i havent blogged in like, ages. *flips hair in a totally bimbotic fashion*

oh dearest blog how i have missed you! :D its just that life has been so hectic recently, i havent found the time to just take a breather, slow down and relax.

updates then!

weeellll, i have decided to try to take on king scout. uhuh uhuh, King Scout. *shy smile*
the sudden (i mean, SUDDEN) change of heart is due to Aaron Wu, who has agreed to share the trials and tribulations with me in our slightly overdue journey to the top. hee hee. i guess all i wanted was a friend to share the whole experience with, one not as intimidating as Aik, Nat or Yoke. (eg: not a super neat and organized logbook chick nor a gadjet crazy muscled out dude)

i'm kinda excited in that crazed nervous neurotic way. you see, 100 km is in a week. and have i mentioned our decision is very sudden? yes? well, thats nice. :D

but dont worry, im sure its doable! life is doable! if you are willing to push, drag and haul yourself over the limit, then anything and everything is possible. even walking 100 km in 3 days. yeh yeh.

btw, looking for a model perintis to borrow. HEH.

***

aside from the insane scout-ness, college has been good. people are still as friendly, if you take the initiative. everyone is forming their cliques too. which surprisingly isnt really a bad thing, plus we have things like LAN, SASA and koko to mingle everyone up again so its all good! (damn, just read that back to myself and i sound so cheery. is emo the in thing again? need to keep up with mood trends. ROFL)

*salivates* hankering for cyber chicken and mamak at E&C (I SO KNOW I WILL REGRET THIS IS A FEW DAYS).

okay, going to have a break from scouts to skype with Kun, watch episodes of HIMYM (there arent enough episodes! *sulks) and munch on something small. ttyl peeps!

btw: happy cny, this year has been a quiet one, but hopefully things will start to pick up over the weekend! HUGS.

2010-01-29T19:07:00.000+08:00

its our first devi's corner meet up without Jou. :/ who has yet to reply my email. we miss you too you black-more-asian-than-ever australian paria.

on a lighter note, college hasn't fallen into place yet. things are still hunky dory and in their honeymoon stages. economics and law are still.. comprehensible. maths is still sorta alright. chap 6 doesn't fit the profile tho. lol. and accounts, HAVING TROUBLE BALANCING BUT ITS OKAY.

spent the day in taylors hartamas, and have concluded the toilets are nothing to scream about. boo debra! haha. ps: SooLihWen for VP! makes me (L) HELP even more. yay. :D

right, gonna go watch some tv now. aaah the luxury of a long weekend!
peaceout brothers.

2010-01-17T21:33:00.000+08:00

OMG I GOT AN EMAIL FROM YOKE TODAY AND ITS SO INSANELY LONG AND WELL WRITTEN AND NICEY SPICEY!

*inserts a billion yays. LOL

not cool.

2010-01-11T23:26:00.000+08:00

college tomorrow is from bloody 8 to 4 back to back classes what the heck. im tired enough as it is from today's classes, and we had a 2 hour break today.

not looking forward to the next 3 mths of lan classes. damn.

on the plus side, i follow yimay back everyday, so the rides back are fun and somewhat comforting. and aik is now enrolled in HELP so thats one down. yoke is enrolling in march, so thats two. ps: nat if you are reading this, you are the last piggy to walk home so im coming for you.

random, but typing on my new labbie is kinda awkward. keyboard is rather shallow, and very spaced out. have to contantly stare at the keyboard all the time and my fingers just keep skimming the board. worse still, im one of those only two-three fingers typing sorta person aka noob so yeah. dying ere.

going to try to upload pictures from cam over the weekend. whee.

okay, sleeping early. duh.

love you all. kun the most. bye.

life isn't a science. its an art.

2010-01-07T23:20:00.003+08:00

all the following pictures are stolen from Yimay. who so kindly took my enthusiasm for the Bollywood Bhangra Club at HELP to heart, and created a whole blog post just for it. *hides face*

anywayy, more updates on past happenings!

Avey's farewell. shes left now, so as happy as this picture seems, it actually isn't very. :(

aandd..

more pics from Jou's xmas dinner. my gosh i miss everyone in the picture. :/ i miss my long hair too. niama why la did i cut it.

kunkunkunkunkunkunkun!

:D Pauline Lim likes this.

thanks May for all the pictures. and thank the lord our college mates dont really know abt ur blog YET. because that bhangra post is srsly. yeah, just srsly. and see you soon NGAIKLYNN. xoxo.

been reading my law textbook. (which is the size and weight of a rather large brick but twice the fun rofl) its damned interesting tho; allows me to believe i have made the right choice? :/ i could see myself doing this for life. however this is only the first book.. so lets not be too hasty in loving. haha

howev, i do think i am sticking to my all arts combination of subjects. law because it what i ultimately plan on doing. econs because its interesting and i might deviate to business in the future for my degree. damn my fickleness. maths because.. well. its maths. and accounts.. *draws a blank* okay i might have to get back to you on that un. my lecturers are decent (aside from econs but at least shes not the pits) and the atmosphere at college is great, so i'm not complaining. just waiting on a few answers from Zhu Shen's brother, and i'm good to go.

okay, more updates another time, kun's calling. (: tara.

hello dawn

2010-01-03T23:16:00.000+08:00

sometime tomorrow morning, as early as hell, HELP and INTI students will all be staring bleakly at their blaring alarm clocks/ phones wishing the nights were longer.

college is here folks. and i wish my excitement wasn't marred by the absence of Kun, but it is. mingle that with the fear of notfittingin and lookingleftout, i am.. nervous. to say the least.

there was a lecturer in HELP that told us college days were the best days of her life. i'm not really counting on that, but it does make me feel better. i mean, its just PRE- university isnt it? a baby step to something bigger.

*insert thoughtful break*

... okay my bludgeoning headache and phlegm is close to killing me at the mo. i will continue this update later. when my sister is not nagging me incessantly like a, like a, like a.. old chinese grandmother. (closest i could find) k, nights peeps.

ps: changed my email add to plinelim@hotmail. to avoid getting beaten up in college. LOL

ten million fireflies

2010-01-01T10:29:00.007+08:00

finally, an update! (a proper one at least)
okay i'm going to run through a few post-spm events that i (miraculously) remembered to lug my camera to.

Judy's Christmas Party

-Judy's place

it was more of a Belian thing, and attendance was good! haha, i attribute that to the end of SPM. am i right guys?

hello Belian Boys. they put the Hardy Boys to shame. (i meant academically)

Zhi Yung looks like he's gritting his teeth.

and here we have our Prom Queen! looking snAzzy in that tiara. we came together, and we both wore red. so when Aik saw us walking in she called us from outside all worried like.

Aik : Hey, is the dress code for Judy's thing red?

Me : ... what dress code? i didn't know there was a dress code!

Aik : Then why are you and Mei in red?! should i go back and change? i can you know.

laugh out loud.

Ching Feng and i. he features more in the next outing.

aaaand JUDY! see, this is the result of REFUSING to take a decent picture.

to be completely honest, it was the first time i actually learnt anything about the true meaning of christmas. about Jesus being born and all that jazz. and about the inevitable world ending and all that jazz.

and to more than completely honest, i only really listened because i was kinda .. trapped in Judy's house. but i'm glad i did. because it really made me think about the bigger picture. and how it is possible that Noah's Ark is an actual, real object. O_O

deep. okay, will rant more on this on my own time. next!

Storm Warriors with Yoke and Aik

-Ou

we had dinner at Charms; Aik had major tomyam cravings.

there we go. tomyam was a little too sweet for my liking.

Storm Warriors was okay a movie. kinda laggy and one move can last 10 seconds, but it was okay. nothing on the series tho. (which, surprisingly, everyone has seen) it was still fun, and more thanks to the company than the movie. :D

moving on.

Belian Outing- Avatar

-Ou

actually, you know we Belian people hanged out alot over the hols. plus i missed Zhi Yung's New Year's thinggamajggy. :/

thanks Jen Wei for asking Phebe to give me a lift. thanks Phebe for giving me a lift. lol.

Ding

THANKS CHING FENG FOR PAINSTAKINGLY PLANNING THE WHOLE THING. :D xoxo.

shafiq is very fashionable. srsly.

monitor and assistant.

Bffs.

smarter than thou.

oh, met Sabs there too. we wore the same shades.

i didn't join them for the movie, only lunch at Milano's. which sucks btw. reminds me of canteen grub. xP

Jou's Christmas Dinner

-Jou's place

for someone that doesnt celebrate christmas, i sure have been to my share of xmas parties. this was another gift exchange. Mei and I had a blast shopping for the presents! we bought a horn, a giant tooth, a fairy pencil, a super large pencil and a beanie bag phone holder (only normal gift. lol) half of the items were green *sniggers* and most of them were pretttty useless. thats why they are novelties, kay gang? ;)

Jou and fairy pencil

Santa's Little Helper #1.

Santa's Little Helper #2.

Balloon May.

Sulky Jou.

i dont have much pictures from this, cause i was too busy eating Aunty Ivy's awesome spread. i DO have random pics of Nat's hair tho. lol. omigosh now i'm craving TURKEY. JOU YOU PRMISED ME CARBONARA. *cries*

Random Adventures of Kun and Pauline.

this was before banana leaf rice at Bangsar, which is the new 'in' thing- for me.

we guided Munyi and Ed there, and were tryna take cute pictures of them in the car and of Munyi driving a manual.

btw i would just like to thank Ed, Munyi, Yoke and Louis for accompanying me on my mad urge for banana leaf. iloveyouall. :D

then some other day we had dimsum. Just the two of us. :D

this is my after swimming face.

and because we loove dimsum..

Dimsum wth Jou

-crashed Jou's place

Kun and I barged in her house early morn to drop of some dimsum. (:

and played with Crumbles.

thats me, and my banana. hee.

HAHAHAH look at Kun's face. iLike.

okay, thats it folks. updates of NewYearsEve soon or never, you know how these things go.

orientation tomorrow. woe is me! will be working on my last day or freedom, in Kun's mama's shop. drop by and visit us!

okay wait wait im not sure if im working today Kunsdadwillbeinshopiscared.

2009-12-30T14:14:00.000+08:00

i have about 5 draft posts. started but never finished.
i have about 10 pending posts. trying to start, but never able to.

and now i have one completed post. brief, but able to fulfill its objective; allowing the public to know i am still alive and well. only busy. heh.

why don't you stay.

2009-12-14T13:14:00.001+08:00

i am back from johor! and feeling much better. :D

we are golden.

it is true then that everything can be solved over a plate of chicken and quesadillas at Chillis. (:

best live performance ive seen yet.

it's like playing Uno Stacko

2009-12-11T23:15:00.001+08:00

i know it sounds so banal and corny, but i really think that love can go sour. very sour indeed. to the point where literally, you can feel this bitter cloying taste at the back of your throat; when you're fighting, when you're looking at him, when you're together, basically.

and you just know, when it reaches that point, that juncture in your relationship that there's no where to go but downhill. spiralling out of control. oh sure, you try to fix things; you try to spend more time with each other, you try to sweeten things between the two of you, but ultimately, it never works out. it's like a fad that has run it's course you know? a chewing gum too long in your mouth, that has lost it's flavour, texture- everything. sad, but true.

i guess, ultimately, the question is- how do you handle it? or more specifically, how do you end it? how can you?

questions, all these questions running through my head.

th-th-th-thongs

2009-12-10T18:09:00.006+08:00

omg omg suzen suzen look! a whole days hard work.
(not like i had anything better to do, since i missed skytrex.)

(sigh, not sulking, moving on. :/)

oh me oh my, i feel so happy with my new layout. only damper on my mood is the prospect of having to upload all our graduation/ mei's bbq pictures. spm has made me slightly anti-technology, even smsing is a chore. code for : i will be procrastinating the upload of pictures. hehe.

btw: running on a tangent, my header, is after a concept in a book i once read, Sunny Side Up. it's like those moments when your mind is thinking about something, lets say the letter A. and then it thinks how that letter A looks a little like an alien spaceship, that has just landed on it's mini tripod. and then it starts wondering why all aliens in movies are generally wrinkled beyond reason, skinny and have huge bulbous heads. then it jumps to you thinking about how you want to watch The Princess and the Frog. which leads to you remembering about your freshly varnished sandals abandoned outside the house. and it goes on. like how one thing leads to another, ya know?

and now i dont know about you, but my mind is constantly running on a tangent. so this blog will now be the avenue for all my random thoughts and thinkings. i am strangely excited!

ps: au naturale: a man or woman with unshaven pubes.

i did not KNOW that. in fact, i nearly commented in facebook that Jou's hair is au naturale. O_O thank goodness i had the foresight to look up the meaning. rofl!

anyways, Nanny now. :D Mr Sheffield!

2009-11-26T02:50:00.000+08:00

WHAT THE FCK AM I STILL DOING ONLINE?

*ring ring ring*

my sister's laptop is cooking my ovaries. time to Go.

Hey Jude,

2009-11-25T23:53:00.001+08:00

next week is a week from hell.

ps: Kun would kill Molly and save me from a vat of boiling poison, if it came down to it. i is happy. :D
double ps: beat that you 8 titted bitch.

...wait.
he feels so remorseful for betraying Molly that he left to go give her a treat and smother her with love all over her hairless muzzle.
sigh, the woes of loving a dog lover.

2009-11-11T18:20:00.000+08:00

after SPM i have decided (sorta, considering more like. yeah contemplating. in a more solid way. i mean it's kinda a circumstantial thing in the end anyway. OKNVM for now it's 'decided'.) - whew. sorry where was i?

ah yes, i've decided (loosely) to go through with my delicate Tying Up Loose Ends project, aimed at rejuvenating my of overall well being and reinstate my sense geniality. :D

i will start anew! i will be niceR to people! i will.. take Kun out for a nice dinner! (random, but also on my list of Must-Do projects)

so yeah. after SPM is over, when i see this, (if this is still the most recent post) i will launch Tying Up Loose Ends.

i am actually.. kinda excited. good sign.

okay happy pretending-to-study-but-ACTUALLY-watching-The-Nanny-out-of-the-corner-of-your-eye people!

Look at the stars,

2009-10-26T11:42:00.000+08:00

this blog shall undergo some serious revamping after SPM.

SUZEN!

ps: i've found the perfect colour for my dress. ho-yeah.*gives you my best cherub smile*

bye peeps. ps: jou/ neeraj, stop with the KimchiMan nonsense. GLARES.

oh double ps: i am now going to HELP College. despite originally being the biggest anti-HELP activist since the dawn of time. but when you're backed into a corner.. beggers cant be choosers. regardless, i have decided to learn to love it. heres to hopeless optimism! and at least i'll have buddies. :D

BURN NOTICE TONIGHT!

purplate.

2009-10-20T11:40:00.001+08:00

a form of release, for a few minutes at least. highlighter and toilet paper. :D

dragonfruit juice. i wish there were paints like this. funky purple with black seeds. woot. :)

before

after.

monster nails, i call them.

okay, time to get serious. unfortunately, i cant study peacefully in the living room anymore. MadHatterSister is watching Indiana Jones. seriously how in the world are we related?

oodletoo.

But we kick ‘em to the curb unless they look like Mick Jagger

2009-10-15T21:26:00.004+08:00

the more i look at my new wallpaper, the more i love it. it just exudes happy-ness. (:

anyways, today i shall be getting my fringe reinstated and HOPEFULLY, be chopping off kun's mane of glory.

pray for him folks. may my shaky-hand syndrome lie dormant today.

so cool. this is us, extra large. :D

photocreditsto- yimay

double ps: Tick Tock by Kesha is very addictive. spm-ers- avoid.

Elisha's Open Hse.

2009-10-05T12:49:00.001+08:00

alright, so i'm breaking the rules. i'm blogging. its just that i cant resist trying out the new blogger features i stumbled upon!

the ability to highlight my words. woohoo. :D

alright! craving #20934- checked. (;

so yesterday a bunch of us went over to Elisha's house to say hello. and to meet Mugly. (i doubt that is the correct spelling, but.. oh well.:)

The Host.

she was worried people might be upset over the fact that she couldnt accommodate everyone on that day, and couldn't invite all her friends. such a nice girl. thats why we stay friends! despite her cat craze and ant phobia. *hugs*

haha. Debra, on her good side. (:

i wanna say Debra doesnt have a bad side, but i know i'll just get a sarcastic "Okaaaay" in response so i'm not going to say it. lol.

Gentle-men. oops pun unintended.

haha. kidding kidding. please dont hurt me guys.

me and my would-be best friend if she didnt constantly regard me as a physco. (picture reminds me of a farmer pulling out a large carrot. somehow.)

this is how we roll.

in primary, they use to truss me up by my hands and feet, steal my shoes, and then dump me on the floor, barefoot, to chase the them.

i cant believe the picture doesnt show Zu with evil green eyes. cause she was preeetty mean back in the days of TTDI. and yes, she was one of the shoe-stealers aforementioned.

we came late. because we are fashionable that way.

i need to work on a less maniacal smile. :}

:D (because that is what everyone is doing)

DU children. and Sha.

and lastly, the TTDI PEEPS.

the world is just.. better with folks like us. haha

the open house was fun. thanks for inviting me Sha!

okay, im going to..watch tv now. :/

seeyou.

oh and happy birthday mother. you are now a senior citizen. HAHA.

2009-09-27T11:26:00.002+08:00

one of those days when everything outside my window is tinted rose, courtesy of the setting sun.

side note: having the flu means wallowing in snotty yellow mucus, being unable to taste food (gasp!), and having to breathe through my mouth all the damn time.

yuergh.

They say bad things happen for a reason.

2009-09-26T18:28:00.003+08:00

Dear Mickey with your rotatable arms, feet and head. we've been owner-keychain since i was like, four, and i love you so so much.

therefore,

Rest In Peace in Disney heaven dear. :)

**
PS: a special note to a certain bastard:-
Hey you. Being in a different country, continent and time zone doesnt diminish what a complete asswipe you are.

**

double PS: i laughed till my eyes got all crinkly and prune-y reading HorngQing's and Yimay's comments on my tagbox. no one can say my friends arent funny la. :) and I MEANT ATRIA OMG SORRY MAY LOL.
shut up HQ. people make mistakes. :D

iCram

2009-09-24T10:21:00.006+08:00

holidays suppose to mean finally getting around to posting all the pictures i owe people. so, in the holiday spirit, here are all the withheld and tucked away photos i have.

most recently, Breakfast with the enam sekawan who stayed (im sorry, the girls only till 4am) at Aaron's house on Tues, watching uncensored versions of Borat and American Pie.

Rempit and I. KD NAT I LOVE YOU.

BD

thanks Yoke, for posing so graciously. hmmph

hmmm. uncensored sex movies.. i wonder who instigated it all? ;)

YEAH I BET NO ONE EXPECTED HQ TO BE PART OF THE 6 EH. LOL. he drove us all back to Aarons hse later. very apek-like. ;D

orite, next up, Lunch with Kun. which was like, what, during the last holidays?

:) nice shirt.

it was at this place i've been frequenting almost my whole life, in DJ, near Centrepoint, which specializes in noodles and porridge. note to self : must bring someone like Yimay one day so she can do a proper review. haha.

very hot that day.
btw Nee, Kun's standing beside the bakery we are suppose to visit!!! banana crumble. yum!

and next is lunch with Nee at Euro Deli. (i dont even remember when we did this. eons ago me thinks)

on the way home.

i dont know why i always go out with people in the most blazing of weathers.

he insisted we talk a walk through the nursey beside my place.

result: 10 mosqi bites. *glares at laughing Neeraj*

:)

lastly, birthday lunch with Lih Wen. my present to her, as the only worthwhile thing to give LihWen is food. :D

if you look closely, you can see her tearing due to the VAST amount of wasabi in her soya sauce. greedy girl.

greedy, but happy. :)

haha, ok gtg finish Mrs Chua's homework and give Kun a morning call.

bye world,
Paulkadot.

Aik Lynn Day.

2009-09-22T11:36:00.006+08:00

at 12 midnight, a few of us invaded DU Court to surprise Aik, one of the many Sept 21st babies. :D

we were somehow.. running short on time. lol look at all us busy ants!

and theeennn....

:) i hope she was surprised.

(in this space was.. well a huge waste of space.)

thanks HQ for the cake, very delicious.

our Naomi made it! (L)

haha so did Aaron, despite his dragon mum. ;)

CV, looking sexy in his 'pjs'

Big Bouncy Boobs! LOL.

thanks everyone for taking the time to come at that ungodly hour. you guys rock, thanks for being so cooperative. i love you all! :D

then on the day itself, we (Nat and Aik) went to go watch The Ugly Truth.

Gerald Buttler just has too many movies out now. at least this one wasnt sweet or touching enough to induce any tears. tears of laughter, maybe.

then we parked our behinds at Juice Bar, and met up with Wandering Peckie and her plus one.

her present from WeiKhai, ZhiYung and Jun Herng. (:

her present from the seven. Sheer by Stella McCartney.

:)

okay, im beat. and i need to do SOMETHING academic related now. so.. tata.

ps: Happy Belated Dear. hope you had the bestest day ever!
xoxo.

2009-09-17T21:42:00.002+08:00

Dear Patrick Swayze,

You were the biggest inspiration. Charles Baker will be sorely missed. You will be sorely missed.
I hope you are happy now, and blessed. I love you, and thanks for entertaining.

PS: THE BEAST WAS THE SHIZ. and now we will never know how it ends.

i feel a 'sad' emoticon just isnt enough.

2009-09-11T17:19:00.003+08:00

you know, even when i'm an old hag (assuming i miss the boat for elegant elderly), i will still summon the energy to command my withered hands to browse blogs. because blogs just are that interesting.

i love the pictures, the thoughts, the feelings i get. never gets old, and makes you wanna just read on and on and on and on. (im gonna add and on more time, for good measure)

for example, today Nicholas got me thinking, thinking hard, allowed me to learn new words (heh) and gave me a whole new train of thought to mull on. he made me question my own views and encouraged my long dormant brain to churn and bubble.

yay NicH. :D

and today, a junior from school, Yi Jean, made me read her post all of once, twice and three times, just to drink it all in. she took a nice solid idea, expressed with a finesse and style i envy. inspired me to, well, concieve this post.

reading these blogs make me wanna do more. i want to do more than just blog now, i want to be able to get people thinking. to pull a smile, laugh or even a frown from readers.

i want to learn something new through the eyes of another. i want to read an engaging article everytime i come online, and share it with the masses. i want, i want, i want..(!) so many, too many things.

hmmm. all in good time, all in good time. (theres something stepping on my sleeve, i think its the SPM Trials. double heh.)

which reminds me, Physics and Boston Legal tonight. if anything could make me stimultaneously smile and grimace, it would be that combination. XD

omgosh gg. my half carton of milk (which i normally consume directly from ze mouth) has created its own dainty watermark on my dad's stock exchange... thingy. ohoh. kk byebyebye! see you fat monsters later. \--/

ps Jou, i cant log in into hotmail. be patient k!

2009-08-29T10:27:00.003+08:00

i really miss my best friend.
currently an Australian citizen.

thanks for always being there, still.
even if it's a phone call at 3 am.
i miss hearing you mumble during our 4 hour long phone calls.

(: i love you Jou.

sigh. growing up kinda.. sucks.

Sajian Naga

2009-08-25T19:10:00.009+08:00

okay, here is that Mei Yin post i promised.

so in alliance with her birthday, Mei made a whole schedule of outings with friends and others to go out.. and well just have a good time. :)

so we went to Murni's (apostrophe? no? im unsure) since i've been wanting to eat there since.. since Mei debased my liking for Jasema's cheese naan. (my favorite i tell you.)

wasn;t a bad place in general, just not my style. kantin food! LOL.

MeiYinWong. altho her shirt is WRONG considering SHE set the dress code for the night which was..

collared T-shirts. WITH STRIPES, no less. :[

but since it was in conjunction with her birthday we let it slide. next time we will get it right la k Mei? next time colour will be.. yellow or orange i'm thinking. ;)

Murni's was.. packed. but we managed to score a table in front of the shop. score!
Murni's also sells very odd, weird, odd and weird food. like the Dragon Pizza Mei ordered and the Soft Shelled Crab Fried Rice Kun had. :S

i recommend you stick with normal Indian food while you are there. heh.

Kun says sorry, he doesnt have steady hands. (:

yes, even in her childhood pictures, she always looked this angry.

and Mei this is the pic Joyce commented about btw. LOL

went to see puppies after dinner. Kun and Mei are like twins seperated at birth or sth. they are so in tune with each other.
then we met up with SIEWMUN for supper. laughed so much, and loud, that that stitch in my side threatens to never go away. lol.

oh and erm, here is what i gave Mei(!)

the car plate says MY 92. and yes, i have to google images of cars because i couldnt summon up a single image in my head. :/

Happy Belated Mei. Heres to many more celebrations alright?. *glasses clink*

another random outing: Kun and I buying shoes and eating dinner... at Itallianies. again. (:

i am an angel with an idea. hurhur.

its economical eating there la, even tho they've cut down on portion size.

vant to eat?
(ASHVIN WHERE ARE YOU LA!!)

and Kun's wrist is doing just fine now btw. he just can't bend it at a certain angle and has lost the ability to juggle cars with his right hand.

but its all good, its all good. ;)

ok, i WILL study now. sayonara!

2009-08-23T21:06:00.002+08:00

one of my favorite songs. alongside Echo by Vertical Horizon.

and sorry for the delay Caren. as you can see, i am not an avid blogger.

kk, back to Youtubing.

babai.

oh sweetheart put the bottle down, you've got too much talent..

2009-08-23T11:38:00.004+08:00

old reruns of Friends are so... therapeutic. (:

more posts later, which includes Mei's bday.

ps: congrats to all those A Levels ppl, and a Get Well Soon wish to Kun who fractured his wrist. :/

Juche

2009-08-17T19:31:00.002+08:00

took time off to watch National Geographic's documentary on North Korea. "Inside".

maybe the world should start allocating a WEE bit more focus on North Korea. its was so.. profound and horrific that it took me an hour of steady contemplation after the program just to wrap my head around it.

just makes you want to erase all previous career plans and become a human activist.

***

lighter note : i went downstairs to play tennis for the first time in four years today! (the last time i played- which coincidently was my first time ever, was a one off thing cause i missed this one ball by like, a whole metre or sth and have since been the laughing stock of my family till now.)

my coach = my 11 year old kiddo brother, Jeremy.
yeah so when we went down, and then it started pouring. so being 'macho' players, we.. played in the rain for two hours.

btw : going back up, we saw sunny skies. nice one la, nice one.

*swap* ball flies..
hey, Jeremy, hit back la.
*swap* ball flies..
its hard to play with a beginner, you hit all over the place!
*swap* ball flies.. i miss..
sorry!

haha, twas fun i suppose. only know my psycho kiasu dad wants to organize a schedule for me. talking now to my "coach" about week long regimes and stuff.

yeah, lets see them try to make me.

The Curse of Facebook Pictures

2009-08-05T20:15:00.002+08:00

i dont really like it when people tag me on facebook. i always look so gawddamn hideous. eg. : my facebook has ~~a few~~ many primary school pics in which i look like a THE no#1 retard.

case in point:

candid. jesas. my face. :/

boxing at Jou's place. i was.. very vigorous.

the caption for this pic on Jou's facebook is Pauline owns at this game.

finally, the truth from her. do NOT believe all this nonsense on her blog about me being all weak in the knees at Tabur! i scaled it like a man, man.

(PS: JOU THANKS FOR NOT POSTING UP MORE RETARDED PICS OF ME. i know you have quite a few from the boxing match. heh. :)

kays back to my essay-like email. ciaos.

Jou Smou.

2009-08-04T18:55:00.010+08:00

recap of some of my outings with Jou.! :D

this is Trop City when she just got back. go Trop City man!

haha, it was a great day. we basically just walked around, talked, walked walked and fed her craving for popcorn and yogurt ice cream. :)

"no no Jou give me bigger eyes bigger eyes!"

wow. HAHA.

and the following pics are from me forcing her to wait on my cam's self timer for self taking pics. Lihwen can testify to how.. long it takes. haha.!

don't be fooled. she was screaming and squirming So Much in between shots.

poppycorn!

i like to freak Kun out like this.

"eh, your eyes too big la"

then we went to Esprit to shop a little. (Jou forced me, to my surprise)

she bought this top after much troubles. right Jou? (;

more Jou for the masses! :D

***

and then on another day we went fondue-ing at Haagen Daaz! :D :D

he cheng-ed us. thank you tailou.

she brought a brother. lol

and here it is bitches!

happy fondue people.

showing her the pros of a canon cam

ooh drop it like itz hoT.

froots. my fav

bluegh. not a fan of hardened choc on ice cream.

smoooth.

candid shots by Kun

not so candid

fun times, fun times. :)

then we went to Yimay's to collect some mags

and i drove that day!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! first time. and no, i wasnt horrible. i was good! :D

ps: I wont be going to Italy.
and yeah, some remarks i receieved today hurt so bad i dont think ill be recovering anytime soon. but yeah, as far as Italy is concerned, i'm over it.

*
it is hard, without you. isn't it?

Italy?

2009-07-27T17:09:00.002+08:00

so i got shortlisted for the AFS program to Italy. i failed to get the scholarship program to US howevz, therefore i have to pay up man. still not sure if its worth it. 10,000 for 2 months; money that could be well spent on A Levels. how how?

anyway pray for me folks. lets hope my dad is feeling generous in any case.

***

ps: just to clarify, Jou's dinner on Thursday was NOT a scout dinner! it was dinner i organized randomly keeping in mind people that would like to see Jou for the last time before she left; people close to her.
ps thanks to the who people actually came up to me to help me organize the dinner- hence their invite. (HQ ily)

so i'm so sorry if i have hurt anyone unintenionally, i sincerely didnt mean it. really. i am not like that.

but there will be a scout dinner soon, so i hope everyone comes.

and please dont allow those seeds of hurt and resent to germinate and grow cotyledons and whatnot, but instead just come and talk to me. i will allow 3 punches a person. :)

i love you all. i am sorry again. :(

gah. PO Ya'll A town Down.

Rewinding..

2009-07-26T11:45:00.008+08:00

first off, thanks Kun dear for fetching me all the way to Subang Airport to collect my beloved camera! :D

camera is working fine now. :)

***

and yesterday a group of us FINALLY made it to Tabur! after many many failed plans. lol.
ps: HUGE THANKS to Mr Cheah for being our chaperone. *bows in gratitude*

so we all squeezed into Yoke's Kancil at 2 ~~3.30~~ 4 in the morning and drove the looong trip there.

nightview. the hike up was BRUTAL fyi.

that is Jou btw. in case the flash rendered her unrecognizable.

aik looks so small kid here.

aaah. Tabur.

nice hues. it was too misty, so we couldnt see a clear sunrise view tho. :/

thanks Yoke for literally catching me when i was abt to fall.

got kinda crowded after awhile. heh.

Mei's phone trying to commit suicide.

the higher we got, the better the view.

our savior. so tired he couldnt even smile properly.

then we all head back to Jou's place to hang with her while she got ready to leave.

thats how i looked like the whole day. LOL. snot!

...and then, before we knew it, she was gone. :(

it was tiring, it was fun, it was memorable. :) and MAYBE i wont object so much to doing it again. just maybe. FAINT POSSIBILITY!

i loved the company. fun fun moments. =D

and Jou's coming back in four months so- its alright! (aussified)

gah, test tomorrow. GG.
more updates later! (: